Birth Story

By Mary Rider
      

      As far as I know, I hold the record for number of babies born at Women's Birth and Wellness (although for some it was Piedmont Women's Health Center).  My husband and I have eight children and the last five have been born downstairs at the center.
       The last time started just like all the rest.  On May 2, 2005 I was 39 weeks pregnant and my water broke.  I had been worried I wouldn't have time to get to Chapel Hill from Garner because as each baby has come, my labors have gotten shorter and shorter.  But I noticed when I lay down, the contractions pretty much stopped. So as long as I didn't walk around, I wasn't in labor!  The thing is I had some work to do and wanted to get it done before the baby came so I wouldn't have to be worrying about it with a newborn!
      

     So I laid in bed and paid a few bills and every time I got up to go to the bathroom or get a drink, the contractions would return.
       About lunchtime I told my husband I thought we'd better get ready to go. We're not too quick at getting out of the house, and I didn't want to wait too long or we'd be stuck in traffic on the way to Chapel Hill.
       My dad, who lives at the beach, was in town. So he went and picked up the kids from school, and my friend Debbie Biesack picked up Bernadette from her high school.
      

     Once we got to the center things went pretty quickly. I had given birth under water to the last four (an experience I highly recommend. It's the most relaxing way of laboring I have found!) and so Sher asked me if I wanted to get in the tub. The one drawback to the tub is that it's so big it takes a long time to fill. I really did want to get in the tub, but by then I knew there was no time for that!
       So for the first time in a long time, I gave birth in the bed. My dad never likes to be in the room right at the moment, my mom made it a few minutes late, and Brianna, the oldest, was too far away to make it in time, but the rest of the family was all in attendance along with a few friends thrown in for good measure!
       I remember it being a busy day at the birthing center, with two other births going on at the same time and someone calling in, just starting labor!  (Was there a full moon? I don't remember.) 
      

     As always, once our little one had made her way out into the world, everyone got to hold her and get a good look at her and admire her beautiful red hair. Then she went outside with her dad for a few breaths of fresh air, and I sent someone to get me some food because birthing is a lot of work, and I had built up quite an appetite.
       But this time something was different. After a few hours, our little one started having some troubles. By then Maureen had come in too, and so she cleared everyone out and we talked about what was going on.
      

     As I had suspected for many months (but hadn't confirmed with prenatal tests), our baby, Mary Evelyn, has Down syndrome. The most devastating part of this discovery was that her heart wasn't working correctly, and she had to go to UNC Hospitals.  We told the older children what was going on and sent everyone off with my mother to stay with friends in Carrboro.
       There is no way to express the fear and pain of the next few days. The ambulance came and took my newborn baby away to the hospital, and we really didn't know if we would ever see her again.  I followed in another ambulance a little later, and my husband drove.
      

     At UNC Hospitals, it was no time before we had a better idea of what was going on.  Although Mary Evelyn's condition was serious, and she had to spend several days in the neonatal ICU, her heart condition was treatable and eventually (in November 2005) corrected with surgery.  Today she is a healthy, happy little girl who greets everyone with a smile and a wave and is currently crawling around the house, taking books off the shelves, a seemingly favorite past time of most of my children at that age!
      

     Would I have done anything differently if I had known that Mary Evelyn would be born with health problems? Most certainly not.  The loving and professional care we received from Sher and Maureen was extraordinary and while the hospital folks were nice, concerned and professional, the birthing center is home for us.

By Patrick O'Neill

     As a father of eight children, I probably have more stories to tell about the birth experience (from the less-intense father-side) than most men. Five of our children (Veronica, Timothy, Ann, Michael and Mary Evelyn) were born at the birth center in Chapel Hill, and another daughter (Bernadette) was born in 1988 at the "original" birth center in Siler City. My oldest daughter, Brianna, is also the business director, so we have an intimate connection with the center -- both the offices upstairs (where our children have watched countless birthing videos, and the "Arthur" animated video for years) and of course the downstairs birthing rooms (I think we've been in all three!) Although our last child was born May 2, 2005, it seems like we're there all the time. (And I love reading the interesting bumper stickers in the parking lot.)

     My wife, Mary, has had four of our babies in the water (in those big bathtubs in the birthing rooms), and that's just one of the many amenities we have appreciated in choosing to experience our family's most intimate moments in the center as opposed to a hospital. For example, when our daughter, Moira, was born in 1994 in a hospital (prior to WBWC), a nurse came into the room with designs on leaving with our newborn daughter to take her somewhere else (I have no idea where). We said, "No, thanks, we'd like to keep her with us," something you would never have to worry about at the birth center, where contact between parents and newborn is sacred, and anything that has to be done is handled bedside.

     I especially appreciate the emphasis birth center founder Maureen Darcey places on honoring the birth process as a natural, essentially non-medical experience. Maureen's role, and that of the rest of the midwives, is to assist a mother in a miraculous, natural event. When my children have been born, I've had total confidence that Maureen and staff have matters under control (and since I have been a major player in helping my wife throughout the delivery process, I appreciate the way the midwives have integrated me into the process in a meaningful way).

     With such a large family, you can imagine the crowd accompanying us to Chapel Hill on the days when Mary's water breaks and a new baby is on the way. When we're there, we basically take over the entire downstairs as the time passes, waiting for the birth of a new baby sister or brother. That's also a special part of having a child at the birth center, where the birth experience is open to all, and the entire family is welcome. At all five of our birth center births, siblings have cut the umbilical cords of the newest member of the family (some volunteered to do the cutting, but then backed out as the process unfolded, but another kid has always stepped up to the plate).

     The birth center has been a blessing to us. It is a place where the miracle of childbirth is allowed to unfold in all of its natural wonder.